I've been wanting to write this post for days now, and finally get the chance. I only wish someone more talented were writing it because I won't be able to convey the humor of this well enough. When we arrived we miscounted our bags and accidentally left Isaac's suitcase behind. After some phone calls, it was determined that the only way to retrieve the bag was to go in person. Ten minutes before leaving, we were told that since the bag was checked in Joy's name that she might be required, so with good grace Joy hopped to get ready to be gone for the day. A man named Prasaad would accompany us to Chennai where we would be met by another friend of a friend who works at the airport who would help get us to the right office and make sure everything went well. The total duration of the planned trip: 12 hours. Actual duration: 24 hrs.
First we went by Autos (the golf cart type machine) to the bus station. There we were made to eat a little breakfast. Due to the heat, no one really ever feels like eating, but we eat a few bites to make our hosts happy. I also buy 2 bananas, one for me, one for Joy, for the journey. We board the bus which will take us to Nellore. This is about an hour and a half journey, and all along the way we stop and cram more people onto the crowded bus. We have a small bench we're sharing with Prasaad, but the majority of people are standing in the aisle, crowded so close no one could fall down. It is hot and there is a wait before the bus gets moving and until then there's no air circulating at all, so within a few minutes Joy and I are soaked with sweat. The whole ride is about what you'd expect of a crowded bus over roads filled with speedbumps and potholes, and occasionally easing off the road to make way for other buses or trucks. So we arrive in Nellore fairly hot and tired.
I should say a word here about our guide, Prasaad. He is about a head shorter than me, mostly shining bald head, with a world class smile that does not leave his face the entire trip, except once. He also speaks about as much english as we speak telugu, so there are some communication challenges throughout the day.
We disembark in Nellore outside the train station. This is pretty fascinating for us Americans who have only heard romantic tales about trains and never actually been on one. It's fairly crowded, so we struggle to stay close to Prasaad and eventually purchase some tickets and head for the platform. Prasaad is trying to communicate something to us about a sleeper car, but we're failing at understanding and figure it's just another Indian attempt to overprotect us, so we sort of dismiss it saying we can ride the regular car. Prasaad again tries to get us to eat something, but now we're hot so we sure don't want anything to eat and we eventually come back to where we will wait a few minutes for the train.
The train arrives absolutely full of people...and hardly anyone gets off. When I say full, I don't just mean every seat is taken, but the aisles are crowded with people standing all the way to the door. So we follow Prasaad as he starts walking to different cars trying to locate a car with enough space for us to get in. Only about halfway up the train, it jerks to a start. Prasaad gets urgent, takes a couple of quick steps and hops onto the steps of the train. Joy and I are just completely lost in a foreign city without Prasaad, so I thrust Joy ahead of me and tell her to jump on. Prasaad has managed to gain the top step so Joy hops onto the steps as the train is now moving at a walking pace. Another man hops on just beside her. Prasaad is trying to make room and gets enough space for Joy to get up another step. The train is now moving at a fast walk/slow jog. I jump onto the lowest step and another man jumps up beside me as well. He and I are basically hanging off the train, and as the train really gets going, we occasionally try to pull up close to the train to avoid objects passing by. Prasaad continues to somehow make space so I eventually gain the top step, where I am face to face with the man who hopped on behind Joy. The final guy now has the best spot on the train as he turns around and sits on the top step.
The inside of the train is too crowded to describe accurately. If everyone decided to give a group hug, they couldn't have gotten any closer. I'm pressed up against a wall at a weird angle, but can't so much as move one of my feet. Then, just a couple of rows away in our car, a fight breaks out among some women. I don't know what they're yelling about, but it's pretty intense. Finally, they stop yelling...but we're on the most crowded vehicle I've ever seen. The people who were just yelling at each other are still pressed up against each other almost face to face. Joy and I start laughing at this. How awkward is that? You've just been yelling at this person, you're still mad, but you're stuck with them right there! Joy and I are having a good laugh over this, imagining possible conversations: "So...that's a nice dress...I still hate you." "Hot weather today, isn't it? You're still an idiot." But imagine the benefits! How many times have you thought of what you should have said thirty minutes after an argument? Well, there you go! You've got your chance!
After about a half hour of this, the guy who hopped on behind Joy does the magic trick that enables him to somehow make his way to somewhere else in the train. Then several minutes later the guy on the step gets up and does the same. So Joy gets the seat now and we're both extremely impressed by the awesomeness of this moment. She's sitting with her feet dangling out of the train! It's terrible! It's amazing! Like so many things here it's both at the same time.
Then the train stops. No reason that we can see, just somewhere in the Indian countryside, we stop moving. This is sort of a problem for the Americans because the only thing staving off our deaths from heat stroke was the breeze coming from the moving train. Lots of people have hopped out of the train and are just standing there and after several minutes some of them just start walking. Of course, Joy and I have no idea why they might be doing this or where they are going. Prasaad suggests that we walk to a bus and take the bus the rest of the way. We're learning that when any of our hosts suggest something, that is there way of saying that is what we should do. Even though to Joy and I this sounds like someone suggesting a stroll across the Sahara, and we've exhausted all but a dribble of our water. But we follow.
This is an example of something else we've come to expect from our hosts: outright trickery. Instead of taking us to a bus, Prasaad walks us ten cars up the tracks till we reach the special air conditioned cars. We follow him on, though we have no tickets, because we're pretty much Lemmings at this point, we're going to follow Prasaad no matter what. Little did we know that things were only about to get worse for us.
To be continued very soon...
First we went by Autos (the golf cart type machine) to the bus station. There we were made to eat a little breakfast. Due to the heat, no one really ever feels like eating, but we eat a few bites to make our hosts happy. I also buy 2 bananas, one for me, one for Joy, for the journey. We board the bus which will take us to Nellore. This is about an hour and a half journey, and all along the way we stop and cram more people onto the crowded bus. We have a small bench we're sharing with Prasaad, but the majority of people are standing in the aisle, crowded so close no one could fall down. It is hot and there is a wait before the bus gets moving and until then there's no air circulating at all, so within a few minutes Joy and I are soaked with sweat. The whole ride is about what you'd expect of a crowded bus over roads filled with speedbumps and potholes, and occasionally easing off the road to make way for other buses or trucks. So we arrive in Nellore fairly hot and tired.
I should say a word here about our guide, Prasaad. He is about a head shorter than me, mostly shining bald head, with a world class smile that does not leave his face the entire trip, except once. He also speaks about as much english as we speak telugu, so there are some communication challenges throughout the day.
We disembark in Nellore outside the train station. This is pretty fascinating for us Americans who have only heard romantic tales about trains and never actually been on one. It's fairly crowded, so we struggle to stay close to Prasaad and eventually purchase some tickets and head for the platform. Prasaad is trying to communicate something to us about a sleeper car, but we're failing at understanding and figure it's just another Indian attempt to overprotect us, so we sort of dismiss it saying we can ride the regular car. Prasaad again tries to get us to eat something, but now we're hot so we sure don't want anything to eat and we eventually come back to where we will wait a few minutes for the train.
The train arrives absolutely full of people...and hardly anyone gets off. When I say full, I don't just mean every seat is taken, but the aisles are crowded with people standing all the way to the door. So we follow Prasaad as he starts walking to different cars trying to locate a car with enough space for us to get in. Only about halfway up the train, it jerks to a start. Prasaad gets urgent, takes a couple of quick steps and hops onto the steps of the train. Joy and I are just completely lost in a foreign city without Prasaad, so I thrust Joy ahead of me and tell her to jump on. Prasaad has managed to gain the top step so Joy hops onto the steps as the train is now moving at a walking pace. Another man hops on just beside her. Prasaad is trying to make room and gets enough space for Joy to get up another step. The train is now moving at a fast walk/slow jog. I jump onto the lowest step and another man jumps up beside me as well. He and I are basically hanging off the train, and as the train really gets going, we occasionally try to pull up close to the train to avoid objects passing by. Prasaad continues to somehow make space so I eventually gain the top step, where I am face to face with the man who hopped on behind Joy. The final guy now has the best spot on the train as he turns around and sits on the top step.
The inside of the train is too crowded to describe accurately. If everyone decided to give a group hug, they couldn't have gotten any closer. I'm pressed up against a wall at a weird angle, but can't so much as move one of my feet. Then, just a couple of rows away in our car, a fight breaks out among some women. I don't know what they're yelling about, but it's pretty intense. Finally, they stop yelling...but we're on the most crowded vehicle I've ever seen. The people who were just yelling at each other are still pressed up against each other almost face to face. Joy and I start laughing at this. How awkward is that? You've just been yelling at this person, you're still mad, but you're stuck with them right there! Joy and I are having a good laugh over this, imagining possible conversations: "So...that's a nice dress...I still hate you." "Hot weather today, isn't it? You're still an idiot." But imagine the benefits! How many times have you thought of what you should have said thirty minutes after an argument? Well, there you go! You've got your chance!
After about a half hour of this, the guy who hopped on behind Joy does the magic trick that enables him to somehow make his way to somewhere else in the train. Then several minutes later the guy on the step gets up and does the same. So Joy gets the seat now and we're both extremely impressed by the awesomeness of this moment. She's sitting with her feet dangling out of the train! It's terrible! It's amazing! Like so many things here it's both at the same time.
Then the train stops. No reason that we can see, just somewhere in the Indian countryside, we stop moving. This is sort of a problem for the Americans because the only thing staving off our deaths from heat stroke was the breeze coming from the moving train. Lots of people have hopped out of the train and are just standing there and after several minutes some of them just start walking. Of course, Joy and I have no idea why they might be doing this or where they are going. Prasaad suggests that we walk to a bus and take the bus the rest of the way. We're learning that when any of our hosts suggest something, that is there way of saying that is what we should do. Even though to Joy and I this sounds like someone suggesting a stroll across the Sahara, and we've exhausted all but a dribble of our water. But we follow.
This is an example of something else we've come to expect from our hosts: outright trickery. Instead of taking us to a bus, Prasaad walks us ten cars up the tracks till we reach the special air conditioned cars. We follow him on, though we have no tickets, because we're pretty much Lemmings at this point, we're going to follow Prasaad no matter what. Little did we know that things were only about to get worse for us.
To be continued very soon...
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